Dastardly Deranged Dexter: Cassie-la Disembowels “Double Dexter” by Jeff Lindsay

Double Dexter by Jeff Lindsay
Genre: Fiction, horror, serial-killer, murder, schizophrenia is way cool
Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars

Summary: Dexter is not your typical blood spatter analyst. For instance, blood makes him nauseous and he murders people for fun. He has a ditzy wife, two psychopathic step-children, a murderous brother who tried to murder his adopted sister, and now: a copycat killer. Not to mention the second voice in his head dubbed the Dark Passenger, a demonic force that leads his darker dalliances.

With the “Dexter” season six finale just two days away, it seemed appropriate to review the newest and also sixth book in the series. How convenient! I couldn’t have planned it better myself, except I did.

For those of you who only watch the Showtime series, with the exception of the first book Darkly Dreaming Dexter, the storyline in the books are completely independent from those in the series. Characters who are dead on the television show are alive in the books, and a few that are alive on the show are dead in the books. Somehow, it works. Any other series and I probably would have complained by now. ::coughthewalkingdeadcough::

Please find below a list of differences between the television show and the series. IF YOU ARE NOT CAUGHT UP ON EITHER I HIGHLY RECOMMEND YOU NOT READ THE NEXT PARAGRAPH- unless you want to spoil yourself.

  1. Rita is still alive, but incredibly annoying. Kind of wish they would kill off this Rita.
  2. LaGuerta is dead, which is good because she’s a giant manipulative bitch.
  3. Doakes is alive, but is missing both hands, his tongue, and a foot (see Dearly Devoted Dexter).
  4. Dexter and Rita’s baby is a girl and has a stupid name. Lily Anne.
  5. Deborah also has a baby, who Dexter is convinced could not nearly be as bright as his precious daughter. She also knows his secret (I wish television!Deborah would find out already).
  6. Astor and Cody are much like Dexter in that they have Dark Passengers and enjoy murdering things (mostly neighborhood animals).
  7. Dexter’s brother Brian, AKA the Ice-truck Killer is alive, and visits Dexter and his family for dinner on occasion. Creeepy.

People who know nothing about either medium, Dexter is a sympathetic murderer, with a blood lust sated by murdering those who deserve death. I.e. they have escaped murder charges, are rapists, cannibals, deranged performance artists, devil worshipers, appendage swipers, you name them, Dexter has murdered them for the good of society and to satisfy his Dark Passenger. This is the creature that lives within Dexter’s psyche and whose hints allow him to solve crimes that the police seem unable to. Because they’re incompetent. I might be a little biased.

This novel opens with the normal dark humor and hysterical inner monologue one would expect from a Dexter book. Specifically, it starts with the murder of Puffalump the clown who is a double threat. A clown AND a pedophile Coulrophobia sufferers rejoice, one less clown in the world.

Like the show, each book follows an overarching plot. In this novel, the police are trying to find a suspect who bludgeons police officers to death with a hammer, and Dexter is on the hunt for his copycat killer, who saw him at play and wants to obsessively become just like him. And who wouldn’t? He’s charming, has a sense of humor, and minus the murderous tendencies he’s pretty damn sexy.

His home life is in just as much turmoil as his work life and personal life. Rita is constantly getting drunk, angry, and nonsensical. As in the other books she seems unable to finish a coherent though or sentence, which I found to be incredibly frustrating. Due to Dexter’s constant disappearances, she’s convinced he’s cheating on her and instead of confronting him she turns into a lush and forces her family to house hunt for days on end. Crazy much?

Dear book!Rita, get your shit together!  Do what is right for your family. Stop getting drunk and crying and talk to your husband. Being a lush doesn’t solve problems. Also, while you’re at it, stop marrying horrible men. First you marry an abusive drug addict and then you go for the deranged murderer. He’s a nice guy and all, but he kind of kills people.

There’s not much to say in terms of plot or any deep philosophical meaning to be found in the pages of a Dexter book. They’re fun, Dexter questions his morality a lot, but it’s still a crime, mystery-esque novel, and to give away too much of the plot would give away all the enjoyment. So instead, I leave you with my favorite lines from everyone’s favorite serial-killer. Sweeney Todd is a close second, but he’s not nearly as funny.

  • “Why should I let anything stand in the way of life, liberty, and the pursuit of vivisection?”
  • “‘Brian and I were just talking,’ she said, probably to reassure me that they had not been performing amateur brain surgery on the neighbors.”
  • “Because I had to keep both hands on the steering wheel, I couldn’t really turn around and strangle him… But Mario babbled on, apparently without noticing that everyone else in the car wanted him dead.”
  • “If only an endangered species of eagle would attack me and claw out my eyeballs, my Wilderness Adventure would be complete.”

If you have yet to read a Dexter book, the above is why you NEED to.

-Dexter’s inner thoughts exhibit Lindsay’s dark humor
-Fills in the gap between the just as awesome television show
-Keeps coming up with extremely inventive, fun killers (death by hammer!)
-Extremely readable, easy to digest in a day or two
Power Saw to the People

-Rita is painful to listen to, and even more painful to see interact with society
-The police are more bumbling than expected… But that’s to be expected

Cannot wait to see how Season 6 ends! Anyone else excited to see what happens during the finale? I love that Harrison’s school just let him leave with a stranger. Damn nuns, letting infants dressed like lions leave with someone who isn’t a parent or guardian but rather a mass murderer wanted by the police.

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